Haven Of Obedience Read online

  Natalie decided to have the fresh pasta filled with spinach and ricotta in a tomato and basil sauce, her favourite meal at Mario’s. Since Jan showed no inclination to eat she had to catch the waiter’s eye and order for them both.

  ‘Don’t you ever get tired of having the same food?’ asked Jan, putting her diary away.

  Natalie shook her head. ‘No, I know what I like.’

  ‘I thought I did.’ Jan’s tone was strange.

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Nothing. How’s the magazine, then?’

  ‘Taking up far too much of my life, as usual. Philip’s dumped me, in case you wanted to know but didn’t dare ask.’

  Jan looked sympathetically at her. ‘Bad luck. Did he say why?’

  ‘Oh, the usual stuff about not wanting to get involved, feeling that I deserved someone better. It’s not what he meant, of course. It went wrong the last time we had sex. I said that I wanted to be on top because my orgasms are always better that way and...’ She stopped as the waiter arrived and they both had to stifle their giggles. ‘He must have missed us,’ laughed Natalie as they began to eat. ‘I’m sure no one else has such interesting conversations.’

  ‘Go on with what you were saying,’ commanded Jan.

  ‘Oh, that. Yes, well, he didn’t like me saying that I knew best. He pretended that it was all right, that he liked a woman who knew her own mind and understood her own body. But it put him right off.’

  ‘You mean although you had a better time, he didn’t?’

  Natalie nodded. ‘Exactly. God, the times that’s happened to me. Still, it’s happened to you too, hasn’t it? That’s some comfort to me. I’m not alone in this.’

  ‘No,’ murmured Jan.

  ‘Is that all you’ve got to say? Haven’t you got any interesting gossip for me? How’s your sex life at the moment?’

  ‘It’s okay,’ said Jan, with a shrug.

  ‘What do you mean, “okay”? Are you seeing someone special?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Are you seeing anyone at all?’

  ‘Yes, now and again.’

  ‘Is there some reason why you can’t tell me about him?’ asked Natalie. ‘Is he married or something?’

  ‘No, it’s just that it isn’t very interesting.’

  Natalie couldn’t believe her ears. ‘Your sex life’s always interesting. What’s the matter? You’re keeping something back from me, I know you are. Is this why you haven’t rung me since your weekend away? Did you meet someone dishy there, someone you want to keep secret?’

  ‘Oh Nat,’ said Jan sadly. ‘I wish I could tell you about it, but I can’t.’ She lowered her voice. ‘You see, it isn’t allowed.’

  ‘Isn’t allowed?’ shouted Natalie.

  ‘Ssh!’

  ‘Why do you keep whispering and why have I got to keep my voice down? I don’t understand what’s happened to you,’ said Natalie. ‘You’ve changed completely since we last met. Have I offended you or something?’

  ‘No, you haven’t done anything,’ said Jan firmly. ‘Please, can we just change the subject?’

  Natalie sighed. ‘If that’s what you want. But the evening won’t be as much fun as usual. You’d better tell me about this place where you went for your weekend. You’re looking really well, so it must have done you good. Perhaps I should go there. Where is it?’

  ‘It’s, uhm ... sort of in the country.’

  ‘That’s a great help. I should be able to find it easily from that.’

  ‘I can’t tell you where it is,’ said Jan, the exasperation clear in her voice.

  Never before had Natalie felt uncomfortable when she was with Jan. They’d always been like sisters, able to talk about anything and everything. Obviously, for reasons known only to Jan, that was no longer the case. Suddenly Natalie just wanted the meal to be over and to escape back to her flat. She felt incredibly hurt. ‘I think you’d better choose what we’re going to talk about,’ she snapped. ‘Nothing that I pick seems to be right.’

  ‘Nat, I am sorry,’ responded Jan, leaning over the table towards her friend. ‘I’d like to tell you, truly I would, but I’m not supposed to.’

  ‘Then don’t. I don’t think I want a pudding. Let’s just have coffee and then split, shall we?’

  ‘Oh, blow them,’ said Jan. ‘Listen, Nat.’ She dropped her voice. ‘I will tell you about my weekend away but you must never talk about it to anyone else. If you do, you’re going to ruin everything for me. So will you promise me that before I start?’

  Now Natalie was intrigued. ‘Of course. You know me, I’m good at keeping secrets.’

  ‘Yes, well you’d better be because I’m risking everything in telling you this. The place I went to was called The Haven. It’s in Sussex. A girl at work told me about it. You see, they don’t advertise. People have to hear of the place by word of mouth, and their names must be put forward by someone who’s already been before they can actually go there to stay.’

  ‘But why?’ asked Natalie in astonishment. ‘Do you have to be incredibly fit or something?’

  ‘Hardly, or I wouldn’t have got in. No, it’s really a weekend seminar.’

  ‘A business seminar? I don’t want a weekend away working. I want a break.’

  ‘It’s a seminar in sex.’

  Natalie couldn’t believe her ears. ‘What on earth do you mean?’

  ‘Exactly what I say. People go there to learn how to fulfil their sexual potential, but it’s a very special kind of potential. You see, it’s for women like you and me, or for men who spend all their time controlling people at work. They teach you how to hand control over to your partner in order to gain your pleasure. I heard one of the tutors refer to it as “the haven of obedience”, which sums it up.’

  ‘I can’t believe I’m hearing this right,’ said an astonished Natalie. ‘You’re not telling me—’

  ‘For heaven’s sake keep your voice down.’ Jan looked nervously around her.

  ‘Sorry. You’re not telling me that you became a submissive, are you?’

  ‘Yes,’ confessed Jan. ‘It was incredibly difficult at first. To be honest, I didn’t think that I was going to make it through the first day and night but I was determined to try. Let’s face it, my sex life’s hardly been that wonderful, running it the way I wanted to, so what did I have to lose? Anyway, once I started to give in and do what they wanted me to, it was so fantastic that I just wanted to learn more and more.’

  ‘What do they make you do?’

  Jan shook her head. ‘Now that’s something I really can’t tell you.’

  ‘I can understand that they might want to keep the place a secret,’ said Natalie. ‘What I don’t understand is why I haven’t heard from you since you got back.’

  ‘Because I’m still seeing loads of the people who were at The Haven when I was. We have parties at each other’s houses, and meet up for dinners that always turn into something rather more exciting. The trouble is, we’re not allowed to invite people who’ve never been to The Haven, which is why I haven’t been able to include you. The awful thing is, Nat, I’ve got so caught up in it that I can hardly bear to take an evening off even to see you, my best friend.’

  Natalie could see that simply thinking about it was exciting Jan. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes bright and her hand, gripping the stem of her wine glass, wasn’t quite steady. Suddenly Natalie wanted to feel like that, to have something to be excited about – and, more to the point, to have truly satisfying sex. ‘Do you think I could go there?’ she asked.

  Jan frowned. ‘I honestly don’t think you’d like it. I’ve rather simplified what goes on there. The place is very strictly run and if you don’t do as you’re told, well ...’ Her voice trailed off.

  ‘Well, what?’ demanded Natalie.

  ‘You get punished,’ whispered Jan.

  ‘Punished?’

  ‘Yes. But even the punishments are designed to turn you on, only in a completely different way from anything
you’ve ever experienced before. I really don’t think it’s for you, Nat.’

  ‘I wouldn’t have thought that it was for you. But you seem to have enjoyed it. Surely they’d take me if you put my name forward?’

  ‘I suppose so, but I don’t want to.’

  Natalie felt as though her friend had slapped her. ‘I think you’re being incredibly selfish,’ she said finally. ‘You’ve been there and come back a totally different person. You admit that your sex life’s now fantastic and that you’re seeing people nearly every night of the week. Do you know what I do when I stop work each day? I go home, drink too much wine and go to bed with only the cat for company.’

  ‘But if I did put you forward and then you didn’t like it once you got there, it would reflect badly on me,’ explained Jan. ‘I don’t want that to happen. I don’t want to spoil what I’ve got, and they’ll start questioning my judgement if I send the wrong person along.’

  ‘I honestly can’t see what can be so bad about the place,’ said Natalie. ‘I’m not some naïve eighteen-year-old. I’m twenty-seven, and I’ve had a fair bit of experience. I doubt if anything they suggest is going to shock me.’

  ‘Oh Natalie, you have absolutely no idea of what I’m talking about, do you?’ said Jan. ‘You’re the same as I was. You’ve always liked being in control, both at work and in bed. The older the pair of us got, the more dominating we became. That’s why we frightened all the men off, only neither of us realised it. At least, I know I didn’t – not until I went to The Haven.’

  ‘I accept all that,’ replied Natalie. ‘If you’re truly my friend then prove it to me by putting my name forward. I promise I won’t let you down, no matter how much of a shock I get.’ She laughed.

  Jan hesitated for a few more seconds and then shrugged. ‘On your own head be it, then. The only thing is, knowing you, and knowing what it’s like there, I want you to take the two-weekend option. I don’t think you’d be able to put up with the intensive course.’

  ‘Whatever you say,’ agreed Natalie hastily. Privately she thought Jan had gone mad. She couldn’t imagine any sexual situation where she wouldn’t be able to cope. ‘You’ll do it, then? You’ll put my name forward?’

  ‘I’ve said I will, haven’t I?’

  For the first time in months Natalie felt excited about something other than her work. ‘How long will it take before I hear from them?’

  ‘I had to wait several weeks.’

  Natalie groaned. ‘Oh, no. I was looking forward to going next weekend.’

  ‘They’re booked up a long way ahead. Now I have to go. I’ve got someone coming round for the night.’

  Natalie didn’t mind any more, not now that she understood why Jan was so busy. Soon she would be as well. ‘That’s all right,’ she said with a smile. ‘Don’t forget to ring them up about me tomorrow, will you?’

  ‘No, I won’t,’ Jan assured her. As the pair of them stepped outside into the fresh air she glanced at Natalie. ‘I really hope I’m doing the right thing for you,’ she said slowly. ‘If you don’t like it, you won’t hold it against me, will you?’

  ‘I’m going to love it,’ said Natalie confidently. ‘I wanted my life to change, but I didn’t know how to do it. Now you’ve solved the problem for me.’

  ‘Give me a ring when you’ve finished the course,’ said Jan, hailing a taxi.

  ‘Aren’t we going to meet again before then?’ asked Natalie.

  ‘No,’ shouted Jan, climbing into the cab. ‘I haven’t got an evening free for the next two months.’

  As the taxi sped away, Natalie shivered with a mixture of nerves and anticipation. She realised that Jan was right. She was more private than her friend, and the two-weekend option was probably the right one for her. She also realised that she’d now taken the first step on a journey that would lead her to discover new things about herself sexually. Unexpectedly, she was already aroused by the thought of learning to relinquish control and be dominated in bed. It was something that she would never have considered for a moment before hearing about The Haven from Jan and seeing what a difference it had made to her friend.

  Chapter Three

  SIX WEEKS LATER NATALIE was driving down a small country lane in Sussex, rapidly approaching The Haven. Now that she was nearly there she felt quite nervous. If it hadn’t been for the fact that Jan had risked everything by putting her forward, she might have lost her nerve, turned round and returned to London. However, that wasn’t an option. She had to go through with this. She only hoped that once her two weekends were over she’d be as happy and fulfilled as Jan was.

  The Haven was a big old country house set in six acres of grounds. As Natalie parked her car in the courtyard round the back of the ivy-covered building, she saw a few people strolling in the summer sunshine. Interestingly, they were all strolling alone: none of them seemed inclined to talk or mix. Pulling her suitcase and overnight bag out of the boot, she walked into the thickly carpeted reception area. Behind the desk a young auburn-haired girl was standing. She smiled at Natalie. ‘Your name?’ she asked.

  ‘Natalie Bowen.’

  The girl’s eyes flicked down a printed list in front of her. ‘Ah, yes.’ Again the practised smile. ‘You’re in room sixteen. I’ll show you the way.’

  Natalie was surprised. She’d expected to be ushered into a large room and made to mix with a crowd of strangers immediately. Clearly she was quite wrong. At the moment this was no different from booking into an ordinary country hotel. ‘Did you find us all right?’ asked the girl, who was wearing a label that said her name was Sue.

  ‘Yes, thank you. The directions I was sent were very good.’

  ‘That’s all right then. Here, I expect you’d like to freshen up before the evening meal.’

  Now Natalie was even more surprised. ‘Don’t I get to meet any of the other guests first?’ she asked.

  ‘You can always take a stroll in the grounds. Quite a few of them are out there,’ replied Sue. ‘Mind you, Mr Gill prefers it if first-time guests wait in their room until they’ve had a visit, either from him or his deputy, Simon Ellis.’

  ‘I see,’ said Natalie meekly. As soon as she was alone she started unpacking, then undressed, showered and put on a short-sleeved summer dress. She was just brushing her long blonde hair when the door to her room opened and a tall, dark man entered.

  ‘Hi!’ he said. But although his voice was friendly there was no smile on his face. ‘You’re Natalie Bowen, right?’

  ‘That’s right,’ said Natalie, with a smile. She held out her hand. ‘And you’re ...?’

  ‘Simon Ellis, your personal instructor for the weekend. You are on the two-weekend course, aren’t you?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘That’s fine. I wanted to make sure I’d got my facts right before we began.’ Taking a notepad out of his jacket pocket he looked around for a pen with which to write.

  ‘Here,’ said Natalie. ‘Use mine. I was just using it to fill in what I wanted for breakfast on this menu card here.’

  ‘Thank you. Well, Natalie, when did you last have an orgasm?’

  She’d been half turned away from him as he spoke, but as she realised what he’d asked her she spun round to look at him, her eyes wide with shock. ‘Excuse me?’

  He frowned. ‘Surely you heard what I said?’

  ‘I thought you asked when did I last have an orgasm.’

  ‘That was what I said.’

  ‘I don’t see what business it is of yours.’

  Simon looked thoughtfully at her. ‘Everything about your sexuality is my business. I’m here to help you change. I can hardly do that if I don’t know what you’re like at the moment.’

  Natalie felt very uncomfortable. ‘I suppose not,’ she muttered.

  ‘You’re not expected to argue with me, you know. The moment you come through the doors of The Haven you are expected to be obedient to our wishes here. Failure to comply with this means that you have to leave. Surely you read our lite
rature? Who was it who recommended you anyway?’ He started to look through some notes on a clipboard that he’d brought with him.

  ‘It’s all right,’ said Natalie hastily. ‘I just forgot.’

  ‘I see. Let’s hope we don’t have any further misunderstandings. Perhaps you’ll give me an answer now.’

  Natalie was very embarrassed. ‘It must have been over two months ago,’ she admitted at last.

  ‘Really?’ Simon raised his eyebrows. ‘You mean you haven’t even masturbated in all that time?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Why not?’ His voice was disbelieving.

  ‘Because I haven’t had time. I’m so tired when I get home from work that all I want to do is have a glass of wine and go to bed.’

  ‘If sex isn’t important to you why are you here?’ he asked.

  Natalie struggled to explain. She was beginning to feel very uncomfortable as he fired intimate questions at her. ‘It is important to me, but I prefer my sex to be with a partner.’

  ‘You can hardly expect good sex with a partner if you don’t keep in practice. Right, take off your dress and panties, then sit in that chair over there.’

  The palms of Natalie’s hands felt damp. Here she was, trapped in a house in the middle of the Sussex countryside with an unknown man ordering her to strip. She could understand why Jan had been hesitant about putting her name forward, because for Natalie the situation was almost unbearable. She swallowed hard. ‘Now?’

  ‘Well, I don’t intend to go away and come back again when you’re ready for me. Come along, Natalie, it’s a very simple order.’

  Clumsily Natalie did as he’d instructed her, but it was only when she actually sat in the large armchair that she realised it wasn’t a normal chair. The seat, which was very deep, sloped sharply backwards and the back was higher than on a normal chair. When she sat down the chair tipped back a little, lifting her feet off the ground.

  She watched Simon cross the room towards her. As he drew closer she could see that his dark hair had a few flecks of silver in it, and that despite the darkness of his eyes and eyebrows he had a very pale complexion. His shoulders were broad, his waist slim and he had wonderful cheekbones.